God is good, but this story isn’t.

You knew I needed to vent, didn’t you?

Ten beautiful minutes of no topic madness, wonderful! I got a text message at around 5:30 from a friend begging me to be awake. At around 6:45 I finally get up and see it. I immediately call her, I mean, when your best friend texts you with that kind of urgency, you had BETTER respond. Come to find out, she was raped.

She got a call from a friend who was drunk. Two guys were with said friend, who were also drunk. One drunk guy decides he likes my non drunk friend. Well, I guess it’s cool to take sex when you want right?!

The shivers rushing up and down my spine are unreal. The flashbacks, the memories. It’s horrible. She went to the ER, thank God. However, she won’t file a police report or tell her boyfriend. Why? He’s a self centered, narcissistic, little man, that’s why. She doesn’t want to fight with him to just let it go. She doesn’t have it in her to deal with it, and I for one can’t blame her. Neither did I. The Navy made me.

Oh, and let me go on a tangent here. Before you strike down God, and ask why did he let this happen? God gave humanity free will, and some people choose to abuse theirs and be ugly towards people. Don’t blame God for this, blame the person with the free mind and the capability to make his or her own decisions.

I just know I need to be there for her, and I only wish I was closer so I could hug her right now, but we live a few states away. I hope she knows I’m a phone call away. If she ever needs me I’m here. I can’t make her report it, although I wish she would. I can be there as best as I can.

If you know of anyone who has been raped, or you personally have been raped or sexually assaulted, go to the hospital and report it right away!!

Why me?

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You had a misunderstanding
A miscommunication
So help me understand
Why you’re so mad
And angry
And hurt
And most of all
Help me understand
Why you want to make me sad?
What did I do?
Did I tell you the truth?
Was it hard to hear?
I’m not going to live in fear
I’m not afraid of you
I have God
He’ll keep me in the clear
And if I happen to die
Because of you
I know I’ll be accepted
And loved
And cherished
While you sit alone
And miserable
And depressed.
Think of me will you?
Before you raise your voice,
Or your hand.
Your words cut deep
And they resonate
they don’t go away
They can’t be removed with band aids.
I refuse to be your Harley Quinn
I’m not going to chase you
And pine over you
And crave your love
Because if you can hurt me
With your words
Your hands
And your eyes
You never deserved me at all.
Why me?
What did I do?
Why should I waste my time
On a hurtful person like you.

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Abuse and/or domestic violence is never okay. Please if you know about it, report it. If you are experiencing it, find help! There are always ways to get help!! There ARE people who care! Thank you.