Everyone has their one thing that is a queue for their anxiety. Whether it’s nail biting, or playing with their hair, or even subconscious fidgeting, we all have at least one.
Mine is the hiccups.
I’ve had them all day. It’s quite annoying, and today has been nerve wracking from beginning to end. I registered for college today. It started off well, I was peppy, happy, and unusually calm. I had prepared myself for this for the last week, and I was actually excited for it. I even spoke to people who I didn’t plan on speaking to! I was pretty proud of myself. If you’re new to reading my blogs, this is NOT a normal event. Normally my jaws clam shut, and my chest gets tight when a new person speaks to me. Maybe it helped it wasn’t super crowded in there. It all starts with big crowds of people, but either way it was nice. I won’t ruin my own moment.
Then…. it came time for registration.
I couldn’t log into my account, so I had to go back to the administration office to get it reset, so I could log in. THEN, I couldn’t find classes in my time schedule I wanted to keep, so I had to go outside of it, and ask my father to take my squirt to school two times a week. I didn’t want to make anyone go outside of their schedules this semester, because I know the actual nursing program is going to kick everyone outside of their schedule, HARD. Finally, I get told ALL the requirements I had prepared myself for, were changed, and instead of having to take the simple TEAS test, now I have to take the expensive ACT instead.
So, then I go and get my school ID, which turns me into an oompa lumpa with red hair. I didn’t let it bother me. I look pretty darn spiffy on my drivers license, which is dang near IMPOSSIBLE to do, so I still have that in my arsenal of self confidence pick-me-ups! Well, after I finish up registering and paying for my classes, I head home. I don’t leave my keys in the car like I usually do, because I’m trying to practice ways NOT to get my car stolen. I come inside to find my cat broke out of the window by pushing the wood next to the AC unit, out of the window. What the heck kitty? It’s not prison in here! I channeled my cats inner fat guy, and caught him, but dropped my keys out of my pocket in the process. I, however, in my own special way, don’t notice this until later.
THEN, my hubby comes home, and shows me a RIDICULOUSLY small check, of which was SUPPOSED to cover rent, groceries, and other things we needed. I was already to a point of going into a full blown anxiety attack from losing my cat, and the events from going to the school today. I calm myself back down, and go through the budget I made, which was fantastically three months ahead(kudos to me!)! We figured out the situation, and resolved it in a happily ever after type of fashion, and decide to head out to family night. THIS, was when I realize I lost my keys. My brain imploded on itself, causing a meltdown explosion on the outside. My hubby, heroically, grabs the flashlight and heads outside to search. I pull myself together and head outside soon after. I ask for the flashlight and powerwalk around my house, swaying the light back and forth hoping for a glimmer. I glance at the pile of cat food used to bribe my cat, and I see a bright pile of shiny.
We go to Walmart, and my hubby, being the way he is, picks up my favorite Christmas movie ever. The original Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. It’s the 50th edition too, so it comes with a cute little story book inside! Then he gets pizza, my favorite pack of cigarettes, and my favorite fountain soda, and we head home. He grabs my blanket, pops in the movie and ate pizza with me. I have the best man on the planet, I just want all of you to know this. He completely melted away the stress of the day. He reminded me of the things that mattered, and celebrated my accomplishments with me. I finally am on my way to my Nursing degree. I got through the day mostly anxiety free! I prayed through the rough moments, which is something I would have never done before. I did a lot of good today.
So, I’ll soak up my victory, with Coca Cola, and Papa Johns!